January 20, 2006

jim jam

We got Joseph a Psychologist! At least I think we do! Jay and I go in by ourselves tomorrow morning to give her a history - which reminds me, I've got to sit today and write down my observations of him so that I don't forget. I get flustered and intimidated in doctor's offices and forget some of the things I wanted to ask about. So, now I always write down all my symptoms and questions first so I don't forget anything. This appointment has been 5 years coming so there's a lot to write down.

While there are a lot of problems & tension with the whole thing, I have to admit it's gratifying to know that someone else sees what I see. That maybe he won't "grow out of it". That maybe it's not "a (5-year) phase". That maybe he DOES need intervention to keep him from going off the deep end and really hurting someone or himself. Finally, someone besides me sees what I see in him, which is the possibility danger ahead.

I don't know what tomorrow's appointment will bring, but at least we're finally able to DO something.

In other news, I'm going to have to take my computer in to be repaired. It's a crap shoot at this point whether the thing will even turn on now. So, at the moment, this entry is coming to you from my work computer. In addition, I can't get the damn thing to boot up, so I can't backup my stuff, which means I'll be rebuilding our finances. Again. This time though, it should only be to November or December, which is the silver lining - if there is a silver lining.

This is what I want for my birthday. I've got several projects under way - Project Joseph (as mentioned above), Project Computer (as mentioned above), Project Stripper, and Project Hot Bod. Project Stripper is the Las Vegas trip we're going to take in September for Jay's 30th birthday. Amy and Dana are already on board. We've also invited two other couples. I've never planned a trip this big before (Vegas, yes, 4 couples, no). But I suppose if I can get 25 people from around the world to converge on one place for a board meeting all on my little lonesome I suppose I can do this too. Project Hot Bod is to get me in shape for that trip. It'll be Jay's birthday - I'll have a few private surprises in store for him. That's great and all, but the way my body is currently, I won't have the confidence to pull it off - hence Project Hot Bod. I've made a renewed effort to WW, am slowly weaning myself from cigarettes, and would like to start working out (hence the birthday present I want). I belong to the gym here at work, however that's not working for me. The gym itself is great. But I slowly discovered that I despise working out at lunch. Morning - at least outside of the home is out of the question. After work before I go home is out of the question, I hardly see my kids at all before they go to bed as it is. This leaves working out to after the kids go to bed. But I know I won't be willing to go out again, so I wanted to be able to do something aerobic without having to have a video to do it. It seems to be a good solution to me so we'll see.

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9:16 a.m.