January 23, 2004
rant on the aunt
Jay got his first paycheck today. It wasn't a full one, just for the 3 days from his 1st week back. He'll get a feull paycheck next Friday. Oh this money is so needed.We had our first indirect negative encounter from Jay going back. Even his picketers were better than this (he went and told them in person). My aunt. She told my parents that they were cheap and greedy (for not wanting to pay our rent/utilities anymore), called me lazy for not being able to cover all our expenses by myself, called Jay a prick scab, and then said that when he graduates in March she hopes that he can't find a job. She said a lot more, actually, but I can't remember the rest, since I'm so mad. She made my mom so upset her heart started acting up and had to get her emergency medicine out. My dad, who makes no bones about what he thinks a "man" should do, and never expresses his love for Jay, but he called her, "a mean-ass cunt" - my father does NOT speak this way about any woman, he's from the old school. He also proceeded to defend Jay, and say that Jay was doing what was best for his family after talking to everyone involved (including him). This coming from the 50 year union member. Anyone, the conversation degenerated to the point where my parents are no longer travelling with them this weekend. I told my mom that yeah, it hurt, but it wasn't any of her fucking business. You see we're not talking about someone I'm close to. My mom and dad are, but I see them maybe once a year. And that's just if they come to my parents house for some reason, which they never do. She's not an integral part of my life, such as Jay's parents, or my parents. So, while I usually don't use that kind of language with my mom, out of respect, that's what I said. And I meant it. My parents shouldn't be put in the position of defending their son-in-law to anyone (or their daughter for that metter). oOOOOOOOoooo I'm just really irked right now. I mean come on. She said some really hateful things. And my parents told her that this has gone on just too long, that the guy who went back with Jay went back so he wouldn't lose his house (his first house, with a baby due in April), not to mention, Jay is still a part of the union, and pays dues, just changed to a different status so we basically wouldn't get sued. She said that the guy should have lost his house. That's the price you pay for being a union man. She said that there's no way we're still a part of the union, "Scabs are just liars, don't believe them". I just don't understand. I'm sorry, but you can't eat on principles. And his crossing came after prayer, and then I told Jay to talk to his friends, talk to the store manager, talk to his parents, and talk to my parents before he came to a decision, and then prayed again. I support him fully, as my husband, and besides, I don't think anyone's right in this fight anyway. And frankly, you have to do what you have to do for your family. Almost 2 months of trying to find another job, going into the 4th month of the strike, no paycheck, and my parents paying our rent and utilities, so that I could try and make sure the rest of our stuff didn't go down the drain.
Uggg. Sorry. Rant.
Let me flip the coin to another topic altogether. I bought 101 Nights of Grrreat Sex for Jay and I. It's not a sex manual. There's a 3 page introduction, and the rest of this 2 inch thick book is 50 "her" and 50 "him" envelopes. There's one at the end for both. The deal is, you open your envelope at the beginning of the week, and have the rest of the week to accomplish the seduction in there. This has been very cool... Neither one of us has done the first one yet, but just the anticipation, and hints and stuff has been great for us. We're flirting, and giggling, and having fun together, and it's something, I don't know, Light between us after the hell that was last year. But I highly recommend it to anyone married out there. There's also one for romance - but we decided to go for the sex ;) It's so nice to have that sexy, flirty, anticipatory (it's secret, so you don't know what the other is planning) undercurrent in the midst of financial stress, work stress, end of school stress, sick kids, tantrum kids, and opposite schedules. It just plain makes like easier to bear. And we truly don't want to become bitter people, or bitter and resentful towards each other. Thank God we've only gotten stronger, but we want to stay that way.
And they said it wouldn't last.
At this moment, what is your favorite...
1. ...song?
2. ...food?
Pasta - any kind
3. ...tv show?
OOoooohhh hard one. Very favorite would be Friends but there are some others that fast approach it.
4. ...scent?
Jay. Whether he's dirty or clean, cologne or not, there's a manly Jay smell. Sometimes I use his pillow just to smell him when I'm asleep.
5. ...quote?
"Christianity is not a way to avoid difficult circumstances, but it is a way to be able to deal with them" - that's paraphrased from an author with the first name of Jan (I can't remember her last name). Normally I don't remember quotes, but lately we've been living this one, so it stuck out in my mind.
